Eight, Nine, Ten! Nice date to rant about life so far~

Today’s date is really nice, 080910; eight, nine, ten! Cool isn’t it? I’m pretty sure it’s an once-in-a-lifetime thing to see such a beautiful date
Up to date, there are so many things that I want to do. Those on the waiting list are things like learning guitar/piano, it’ve always been my dream to be able to play some music instrument! But I have not been pursuing my dreams despite “dreaming” of it for many years, now it’s kind of too late already? I hope I still get chance/time to learn it!
I want to learn driving also! Many people tell me it’s best to learn now, but firstly is the time issue, due to the fact that I’m still serving army now, my time is pretty limited! Burning weekends doesn’t seem to be a good choice either. Maybe when comes nearer to ORD (finishing army services) already, clear leave/off and go learn! Then one shot master it. haha!
Now back to the most important thing, my future! I’m still pondering between which University or rather, which degree course to take up eventually. Should I remain in NUS, where my placing is in the Bachelor in Computer Science? Or should I change my destination to NTU and take up the double degree course – Bachelor in Computer Science and Bachelor in Business Studies? I really wish to study business, but is a double degree really what I want..??
Days in army isn’t going very well. My fellow company mates and friends in SISPEC BRAVO COMPANY are so gonna wonder what’s wrong with me, why am I feeling so down about army. I used to be so motivated and high in morale during my days in Bravo coy, until the extend that any enciks that I encountered, thought that I’m a signed on regular!
I’m pretty proud of it though. haha! Days in SISPEC are really fun! People around me are motivated and we help each other in all we can! It’s quite interesting to see whole coy of people (around 200 people) being so united, jokes and have fun together! Missed the days we suffer together during outfield!
Back to Artillery… things are not going well at all! I wonder why is it so different here.. back in SISPEC, I can manage 200 people and worked well with my enciks. But over here, I’m having difficulty. Not with the 50 people under me, but with the commanders level personnels. I really can’t understand why. Isn’t it that people always said that commanders communicate better with fellow commanders?
To me, it’s definitely wrong.. I communicate very well with my gunners. Be it the gunners who are directly under me or those in other detachments, we’re all pretty close, we can joke around and perform tasks together. But when it comes to commanders level communication, it seems hard, really hard. Different thinking perhaps?
There’s one thing which made me very confused… my approach ever since my infantry life is like this:
When you don’t know something, ASK! Don’t ASSUME… because if you ask, the most you get F (scolded) only, you can still perform the task smoothly and avoid future trouble. Learn from everything that you ask. As far as I know, I only ask things which I never encountered before (encountered before, asked before, still ask again for what=.=) and important things which I see a need to ask (of course lah, if not why I ask? Not important things, I ownself decide already, still ask you meh=.=)
Why do I ask?? If I don’t ask, I assume my own ways of doing it and performed the task wrongly, I not only give trouble to myself, I give trouble to my superiors as well, because certain stuffs once screwed up, they have to step out to handle it… and not only that! My gunners will suffer, that’s the last thing ever that I want to cause!!! They are totally innocent, have no power at all, yet going through sufferings JUST BECAUSE WE, AS THE COMMANDERS, DON’T TAKE INITIATIVE TO ASK AND FIND OUT HOW TO PERFORM THE TASK ASSIGNED TO US.
I really can’t tolerate that. AT ALL.

I always stick to my principles and do things. However, I encountered problem recently at where I am now..
When I don’t know anything, I can’t ask. If I ask, I get F (scolded) for “asking too much“. Trust me, I can swear that almost everyone there don’t know the answer of what I asked also, they just don’t dare to ask, waiting for someone to ask / waiting for someone to get scolded first then they listen to the answer while laughing at them getting scolded.
Despite so, I still want to ask. Not because I’m a cock who like to get scolded, it’s because what I need to ask on is something which is important. If I don’t care, and others also don’t care, all of us just simply pretend that we didn’t realise this or that flaws regarding the plan, we just simply ASSUME that we’re right and perform the task, there’s a high chance that things will go wrong and many people will suffer..
I don’t care if I suffer, I have been suffering everyday, mentally especially, due to the fact that I don’t know why life over here is so mentally tough, I’m really in the middle of nowhere, don’t know what to do – the RIGHT things that no one is following which becomes like the WRONG things, the WRONG things that would definitely still be the WRONG things, the things which I’m not sure of yet cannot ask, which I have to assume and so it’s gonna be a WRONG thing again, every damn thing there just seems so WRONG. There isn’t anyone with common interest with me, which is to improve the life and ways of doing things of the company/battery. It’s pretty depressed to know that I’m fighting the damned battle alone.
There are many things which the gunners don’t know. What ever things we’re doing are for their own good. Small little things like asking them to keep quiet when in a file and march properly to the cookhouse (it’s just a 1 or 2 minute march!). It’s not like I want to make things difficult for them, don’t let them talk.. it’s wrong to talk in a file, if I, as a specialist, don’t care about them, when an officer or someone else saw it, they are going to get punished even more painfully. By then I’ll be guilty for not protecting them in the first place. They just don’t seems to understand…
Still remember a few weeks ago, a few of my gunners were confined for not sleeping at night, got caught by the Duty Officer. Ever since I’m in the company/battery, I almost every night will specially spend time walking their corridoors to ensure that all of them are sleeping, not playing handphone etc. If I caught anyone, I’ll just ask them to go sleep, and they will do it.
That night, I was tasked to be the vehicle commander for some test driving of Himars. Thus I’m not in camp… and that night, people were caught by the DO for not sleeping (playing handphone/PSP). I’m damn upset after knowing the news. I don’t understand why they just don’t want to listen..
All right, I’m getting kind of down already after all the typings. There are so much more about my recent life. Even things like I want to do web design job! Finding.. and also, many other things. But I’m gonna stop here already, got to go book in already (nights out now). What a long post of rantings!.. Don’t bother spend time reading if you don’t care~
Till I blog again, probably on Friday (Hari Raya) since I’ll be in camp all day long as the Company Duty Sergeant (COS)! What a boring public holiday~~~~~~!!!!!!














































































































An activist group, known as Anonymous, who was protesting against the Australian government’s proposals to apply filters to internet in their country, has now temporarily blocked access to key Australian government websites plans to continue its cyber attacks, as confirmed by BBC News.

















































